“God knew better” by A. Dakala

A man’s childhood downfalls damaged his character. His insecurities lead him into abusing romantic relationships that once had a promising future but eventually a web of red flags and lies would lead to betrayal. It took one text message that ended it all.

Men will do whatever it takes to get a woman’s attention, whether it’s hiding behind fake characters of who they really are or buying their love through hush gifts and money. A Godly heart can not be bought and if there’s any woman out there who thinks money and gifts are true meanings of love, your wasting your time and putting your life on hold for finding true happiness. Ask Breona if you see her.

I write this with a very heavy heart, knowing that my best friend is going through turmoil with the man she claims she love. On the outside looking in, I see a totally different individual who tries to deceive women with fake attention, money and gifts but in return; it’s all about his addiction to sex, controlling attitude and a childhood filled with abuse from his father. Men like him, doesn’t care about a woman’s heart, their too busy thinking with their penis; looking for ways to be in control.

My BFF met Jerod Mathis through some mutal friends. Though no one really knew this man and anything about his past, he protrayed himself to be a gentleman; but he really was a sheep in wolf clothing. Unfortunately, my girlfriend Breona was deceived by the fake smile, the over baring attention and his control tactics that were far from being a real man. In the beginning, she seemed happy, her and the kids were traveling forty five minutes to his place on the weekends, I thought maybe he had changed. It was hard for me to catch up with Breona most of the time and when we did have a few minutes to meet up to have a drink to discuss life and love; it was always interrupted by Jerod calling and checking to see where she was, who she was with and when was she going home. His ass would even make her video chat him to verify that no men were present. Her entire demeanor would change when he called, she would race out like he was clocking her running to the finish line. That was the first signs of my worries, for her and the kids safety. I’m pretty sure this has been going on for some time now, way beyond me witnessing it first hand.

One weekend on a girls day out shopping, Jerod was blowing Breona’s phone up. The voice mails he left sounded as if he was drunk. I remember awhile back she explained to me that he had a drinking problem and even his mom had asked her to talk to him about cutting down on his drinking. As soon as you confront him or want to talk about an issue, he turns and plays the victim. He would cry fake tears to get his way. It wasn’t long before shit would hit the fan; I received that phone call I was praying i never would get………..

“Running A Muck” by A. Dakaka

My girlfriend Phelicia Locke and I was living a life like the Joneses. Lavish vacation trips, exotic cars and two vacation homes in two different states. Living the perfect life but there was two things bothering me on the inside that I was keeping from her. I’ve came close to telling her on numberous occassions but it never seems to be the right timing. A blind man could look into her eyes and see her happiness and who am I to spoil that. I knew at some point I either had to come clean or she would hear about it in the streets. “When you begin a journey of revenge, start by digging two graves: One for our enemy, and one for yourself.” Chinese Proverb

See, two years ago I lost my job to a jealous co-worker who was out to destroy my representation and character. I reported the incidents to human resources but nothing seem to come out of that to resolve the conflicts. I started to feel like I was being pushed to the my limits and I needed to defend myself from a hostile work environment. I started looking for other jobs, but no one was making me an offer with all the experience I had. I was either over qualified or my salary ranage was too high.

Oneday, I came into work early and discovered my office door was unlocked and my desktop and computer was completely unplugged. Someone had done this on purpose. I knew after thinking for a few minutes that it was that country Alabama red neck who’s been pushing my buttons. Human resources didn’t seem to care and displayed how racist and didn’t care if anyone saw the discrimnation cards they played. So, one day on my way to work early, I saw his vehicle parked at a local wafflehouse. He would normally stop there in the mornings to grab breakfast for him and his buddy the maintenance man. As I drove by, something came over me and I made a u-turn in the street. Pulled into the parking lot from the opposite end, cut my lights off and walked up to his vehicle and cut both of his brake lines. No one that I knew of saw me, so I jumped in my vehicle and drove to work; which was another ten minutes on a busy Atlanta Hwy.

I didn’t act out of the norman once i arrived at work and did my daily routine; open my office, spoke to whoever was there, went into the break room and fixed myself some coffee and checked the daily production schedule. By the time I got back to my office, the other employees were coming in by the dozen. Old redneck ass hadn’t made it in yet I see. An hour later a few other managers peep their heads in my office and asked have I seen redneck ass, so I gave them the political correct response I always do, “I didn’t know I was babysitting ignorance.” Then on the loud speaker, the CEO announced for everyone to meet in the conference room for a brief meeting. Everyone dropped what they were doing and headed up front the conference room. No one was smiling and the human resource lady had a look on her face as if she had been crying. “Shit someone is getting fired or has gotten fired” I thought to myself.

“Good morning everyone, I’m going to get straight to the point.” “I never like delivering bad news but apparently Gary Thomas was involved in a deadly car crash on his way to work this morning and was ejected from his vehicle into on coming traffic and was pronounced dead at the scene.” Everyone was shocked; except me. A few gasped for air and a few of the other redneck trump supporters eyes filled with tears. Personally I felt I had just scratched off the winning lottery ticket numbers on the inside. We were all dismissed from work that day. As I drove passed the waffle house, all I could see was me cutting his brake lines on his vehicle.

Once I got home, my girl immediately picked up on something was bothering me. I explained to her that the old fart redneck who kept harassing me was involved in a bad accident this morning and died. “See, see God don’t like ugly, his ass didn’t think karma was going to catch up with his old dusty redneck ass”, she said aggressively. I just looked away and dropped my head. I couldn’t dare tell her what I had did. The week of his funeral, the job took up money to send his wife, I didn’t, there was no need for me to pretend that I cared about him, when I hated his ass with a passion.

Months has passed, the job hasn’t gotten better, and I’ve developed this paranoid sense that everyone is watching me or the police is going to show up at the job and walk me out in handcuffs. My sleep pattern hasn’t gotten worse and I’ve started to drink a few bottles more than I use too. All I can do now is think about what if they come looking for me, I have so much to lose. For now i’m just going to pray on it and take it to my grave.

Pain Makes A Diamond Lexus by A. Dakala

Yesterday, I pulled up at the red light anxiously waiting for the light to turn green trying to get to my dentist appointment. To the right of my vision, I could see the front end of a white Lexus pulling up at a high rate of speed. My first thought, another one of these youngsters wanting to race because they see a nice vehicle on rims ready to test out their engine. As the turning light turns green, the Lexus moves forward and now we are even. I never even glance over to see who was driving. The traffic light turn green, I punched the gas pedal; I went zero to sixty in seconds, I could see the white Lexus gaining ground. Once I made it to the next light, I pulled into the gas station. The white Lexus pulled in right behind me. I got out trying not to make eye contact with the driver. “You know you cheated right?”, I looked up to a beautiful, thick and sexy pecan tan female walking towards me. “I didn’t know you wanted to blow out that little engine,” I said. She laughed and reached out her hand and I shook hers. “I’m Dak,” I said. She introduced herself as Shaky. “So I guess I will get your government name over dinner,” “What make you think you going to make it that far, you know we met before on the dating app right?”, “Yes I remembered you and I figured, at some point you will want to redeem yourself trying to get even, since I embarrassed you back there and you owe me an apology for not following through the first time we met.” I laughed, if I recalled, you went out with your girlfriends and was going to call me once you got home, after 2 am, I never heard from you.” “Ok, mister; you are right, I had too much to drink that night, second time is a charm, so call me.” She gave me her number and walked away, all I could do is say damn to myself and not mention I filled up my tank with gas when I was only trying to put twenty dollars in my tank. She had me distracted with that big butt.

Two weeks later, we finally going on our first dinner date after spending days talking on the phone and catching up with each other from our first encounter. I felt like I had been knowing her for years. So this is how it all started.

Both fed up with being alone and the world of merry go round dating, Shaky and Dak decided to give online dating a shot.  For months they searched, started over and met up with individuals with the same old lame mentality and none seem to be that one they both were looking for.

     A few minutes later the two chatted back and forth online; this went on for about a week or so. Everything seem to be out on the table and very straight forward; getting along very well we decided to exchange numbers.  There was a instant connection, we talked and texted throughout the day for weeks.  Naturally, the next step would be to actually meet face to face.  It was then decided we would meet; of course, Shaky being the old-fashioned type when it comes to the dating scene; she insisted I take the lead on making the arrangements.  

     Being that my life was a bit more hectic, Shaky was good with being flexible because everything was going well, and she didn’t want to add any additional pressure to my complicated work life schedule; plus she worked from home. 

     Today, was the day we would finally meet, I couldn’t wait but some time had passed, so I texted and called Shaky, but she didn’t response to either. A couple of days went by and then the anxiety of waiting kicked in. I got worried at first, then it that turned into anger; “was she playing games, am I the topic of her next girlfriend outing?” I said to myself.  I wonder was this all just a big; let me see if I can get him Interested or a misunderstanding?  I decided to take it to God, I knew I really liked Shaky and felt she liked me too but what happened? That night I fell to my knees and took it to God.

“Lord, please guide me in the right direction, whatever you tell me to do I will do, but God, if this chic is not in the hospital with a leg or arm wrapped in a cast or had a family emergency requiring her to get on a airplane to Cheraw, forgive me for the pimp words I’m about to release from my tongue on her ass” Amen.

     I decided to give her three days, that is what I told God and God agreed.  Either she will reach out to me or I would reach out to her for a complete understanding of her disappearing act.  “Father give me the willpower; this is the longest three days I’ve ever been through waiting on a woman; sitting in the dark.” 

     A one-sided view of a relationship unfolding. My heart believes God is the key to every dilemma, challenge and good thing in my life. No matter what, He has the final word and say so. It’s not clear as to how strongly Shaky feels about my beliefs but it’s still early and patience is the one thing I know I need to work on. 

     My request was honored. Three days of her silence; God would show that he was listening to my prayers. Shaky rose from the concrete like a rose in Tupac’s poem after three days, but this felt like months for me. Shaky actually texted her on the third day and explained her circumstances. Not sure if I was buying all of what she was selling, but I knew how to keep the receipt of lies just in case I needed to get a refund upon my investigation.

     We seemed a bit closer even after that situation; still not defining their relationship or the desire to embark on one with each other; just letting it flow and continuing innocently flirting our attraction to one another. I’m still practicing patience and perhaps Shaky was practicing precautions, both unwilling to commit to calling this the beginning of a relationship. After a few weeks of bliss, Shaky once again fell of the radar… here we go again. 

     Refusing to believe Shaky didn’t get how important communication is to any relationship regardless of the dynamics, I couldn’t believe we were back to square one and once again, I was left sitting in the damn dark, but this time I took my ass to bed.

     Lying there for a few minutes in silence after trying to get my own mind and heart together; the phone rang, and it was confirmation on the start of a new job. That call made me feel good but still there was one more answer I needed. “Did she move on, was she not the one or was I not the one for her?” I wondered. I decided to call Shaky from my home phone, and she answered. I was very cautious in approaching the conversation because after all, we weren’t in a mutually committed relationship. “Should I express my anger or concerns?” I thought.  All I felt was disappointment because I thought better of Shaky.  

     Apparently, I forgot she had blocked Shaky after drinking wine all night the other night and forgot to unblock her. She sent me screen shot of all the messages she had sent me.  So, there it was, an issue of technology and misunderstanding. God did it again! Shaky and I are no longer sitting in the dark waiting for each other, I see a light leading me on a path that only God knows where it will lead us. Our communication has to get better moving forward. Shaky also agreed to do better on her end.

     For the most part, Shaky and I were living life. I wondered from time to time if I was too much for Shaky. Was she afraid of getting too close to me; for fear that I would hurt her? We haven’t really had much conversation about past lovers, likes or disasters…I didn’t ask her because that would mean she would have to be prepared to reciprocate with answers that I would rather not give at this stage of the relationship.

     Shaky would always mention being overweight and having love handles, was she kidding or was it a fishing expedition preparing me for something she thought could seriously affect the flow of this slow boat to China speed we were going. At this point, if Shaky thought she needed to be perfectly shaped and fit for me, then she really didn’t know me at all. Now I wasn’t expecting to meet Ester from Sanford and Sons. I had no idea; it had been almost two months and we still haven’t had sex with each other. Last night I was thinking would Shaky put her stamp of approval of me by introducing me to her kids.

     Finally, we decided to meet up halfway in Cedarville on New Years Eve, check into a hotel at ten o’clock on a Wednesday night, 2 hours before the new year. I checked in, go showered, put the baby oil on the night stand, set up the Bluetooth speaker to play some Heather Headley love tunes, chilled the bottle of wine and dim the lights. Texted Shaky the room number, second floor, room 204.

At midnight it was a New Year I would never forget; sitting in the dark room alone once again. 12:01am.

The End!

Pretty Poison by A.Dakala

Simon and I are still together; the wedding just got called off temporarily until I can get my thoughts together on exactly what I wanted to do. My friends say that I am living in a fantasy world and that I need to get my life together. Unfortunately Simon hasn’t always been the guy that they have grown to love, beyond the money and the materialistic gift given; he can be a asshole to the third degree.

I grew to love him out of boredom and settling for less. Over the years we both did manish to changed one way or another; and our once head over hills love for each other turned into arguments, fights and resentments. We had a set of friends who didn’t like each other, so getting everybody together for a weekend of bowling seemed impossible unless the bowling alley was heavily guarded with arm security. I wasn’t sure if Simon was homophobic or not but, he could not stand my guy friend Sandy because he was Gay. Lord knows I bet not tell him that Sandy was HIV positive, he would probably pack my bags and through them out the window while I am sleep.

Lately when I’ve been wanting Simon and I to go out on a weekend date night since he got his new car and even personalize his tag; “Mr. Simon” on it, but he makes up some of the poorest excuses I’ve ever heard. So, when he do I get my ass dress, call my friends; mainly Sandy, sneak in Simon’s wallet and take two or three hundred dollars, because my first few drinks go be on his ass and go to the bar downtown.

I have more fun with Sandy and my girlfriend Mina anyways but they always have my straight ass in this gay lounge called Scorpios. I do admit the LGBT community really knows how to party, but I’m straight and do not go that way.

When I left the house Simon was on his laptop downloading music; not sure where he is playing it at, because his car doesn’t have a cd player in it and he doesn’t play it around the house. He’s probably make cds for one of those bimbos in his office, those bitches do not like me at all. I tried to give him a kiss before I left but the negro pushed me off as if I was bothering his ass. As I drove off looking in my rearview mirror, I could see Simon peeping out of the window between the curtains. He’s up to something. I love this man so much but its obvious he don’t love me anymore in the same way or if he even loves me at all.

I met Mina at Sandy’s plushed out condo and parked my car. He lives in a luxury high rise apartment in Atlanta’s downtown Atlantic station area; on the forty second floor. When I say Sandy has style, this dude got all white everything, from leather furniture to white thick bearskin rugs. If I ever did a photo shoot it would be in his living room; naked because he not worried about seeing no pussy. Now my girlfriend Mina is a no nonsense person , who will fight your ass until her titties pop out her shirt; then fix her weave and makeup with your mirror afterwards. I keep her in my circle because we have so much in common. Oh, and she goes both ways sexually. She always have since we met in college; by accidentally dating the same guy. After we both showed up to his dorm to congratulate him on the basketball teams win. She hugged him, I hugged him, I kissed him and she smacked the hell out his ass. We both got kicked out the building and ended up being friends from that day forward. She’s really the life of the party. We took two rounds of shots and headed to Scorpios.

I still try to communicate with Simon just to keep him posted on what I was doing. Like always he will not answer his phone; but will text your ass to death and his ass can barely spell. Good thing he didn’t pick up; these shots got me talking shit and Tripping; I probably would have told him about his momma needing to put on deodorant next time she comes to visit us. I’m tired of disinfecting my house after she leaves.

We pulled up to Scorpio’s and we all was tipsy. Mina already started her people watching and Sandy scanning the parking trying to spot anyone he knows creeping. I had to warn Mina about driving so fast, as she pulled into a parking space next to this pretty red Porsche. Simon never kept his Porsche that clean, that’s why I don’t ride in it. “Girl, you bet not hit that pretty as whip; with that Mr. Simon personalized tag on it”, he said slowly looking at me.

A Storm in the Pulpit by A.Dakala

Pastor Derek Bates was well known in the community as a dedicated church leader; who counseled single men and women and married couples in building a love relationship amongst God. His ministry seem to be very successful and has been publicized up and down the west coast uplifting troubled relationships into healthy spiritual leaders.

Church on sundays at times seem like an arena of speed dating. Everyone was looking for that man of God or God fearing woman to build a strong relationship with; especially when it’s started in Gods house, around God’s people and translated by God’s words. Of course no man is perfect and we can often lead a horse to water but we can’t make him drink. Brother Derek had lead many women to the waters to drink; but many were unaware of the contamination embedded deep in his soul. He would often fill in for Pastor Wilbert Hall the church’s Lead Pastor, who spends a lot of his time over the summers; traveling conducting missionary work.

Over the past few months, some church members have notice on a couple of occassions different women joining him in the congregation. But this one particular female that someone in the congregation recognized by the name Storm; has been with him at church for the past eight weeks straight. Pastor Bates has yet to introduce her to any of the church members and this sunday he will be preaching the word in Pastor Hall’s absence. Of course there wasn’t any concrete evidence that anyone knew Storm and the only time she has been seen is at church getting out of her new snow white Maserati.

Sister Gloria Williams says she spotted the two in Walmart Tuesday evening buying gift cards for the church annual raffle give away. She passed the young woman pushing a buggy down aisle three; she spoke to her but never received a cracked of a smile back. Pastor has always been attracted to those big butt coke bottle figured women; add her name to his list. Pastor Bates recognized and acknowledged her as well as introducing Stormy as a part of United Baptist Church of God’s newest family member. “So sister you are considering joining us or you have joined us?” said sister Gloria. Storm just smiled as she looked up at Pastor Bates, queuing him to intervene; as words fumbled out of his mouth. Sister Gloria said she either just left the gym, headed to the gym or that was a weekend outfit she had on because her titties did more talking than her mouth. Sister Gloria wanted to take off her shaw she was wearing and give it to her to wrap up what God gave her. Pastor had on jeans and his signature church shoes looking like a pimp out of a GQ magazine. He seem to be in a rush and almost cut off the conversation until sister Gloria heard her name being called over the store’s intercom system to pick up her car from getting a oil changed. Sometimes Sister Gloria stretches the truth a little so there’s no telling what she saw or didn’t see. It may not have even been Pastor Bates.

So that Sunday morning in church all of the nosey church ushers and part of the Deacons on the church boars, couldn’t wait to see who Pastor Bates had with him. So they all piled up on the first three rows to get a glimpse at Pastor Bates mystery woman. “A man with no kids, never been married; got to… be playing house with a full glass of milk” said sister Annie.

The congregation was prompted to stand as Pastor Bates made his way from the back of the church to the front. As the congregation looked on, none of them saw Stormy walk across the stage and sat behind the Pulpit. Pastor Bates walks up the steps and greets her with a kiss on the cheek and shakes the other two guest sitting up there too; hands. Women started looking at each other, roll eyes and Stormy sat there proud with her head held high as if she was the first lady; clutching her Louie Vitton purse. Then Pastor Bates wanted make an church announcement to the concongregation. Everyone was whispering. The usher haters were still, staring at Stormy side ways. “How dare he brings this side chic in the house of the Lord and parade her around us Christian folks like this is a circus.” said sister Pauline.

“Its been a great honor to fill in for Pastor Hall over the years, unfortunately he will not be returning to United Baptist Church of God; he has been called by the Lord to serve a higher purpose christ.” “So its a privilege and honor to introduce to you; United Baptist’s new Leading Pastor, Evangelist Stormy Sterling!

Fat Girl by A. Dakala

Tesia Feely wasn’t always a big girl. Over the years of being in a verbally abusive relationship she seem to allow herself to binge eat when stressed out over bullshit.

“This working out in the gym after work is not working for me for Sharon.” “I feel like everybody in there is staring at me; wondering is the big girl going make it or pass out.” “I’m Comfort being like I am; it just gets a little uncomfortable when I’m trying to look cute at times in my clothes.” “My hair is always the bomb, my skin is flawless and I’m a big girl with a big butt.” “What man doesn’t want a bitch like that.” “Girl you got it going on, it’s your health I’m worried about; atleast walk and eat better and if some guys love that about you why can’t you keep a man?” said Sharon. “Girl I hear you, but I’m not into the organic foods, soy milk and a bitch definitely is not turning into a vegetarian, I love my meat; so now what?” We are going to walk daily, incorporate more walking, eliminate the sodas and sugars and minimize the alcohol consumption. “Oh hell no, you trying to give a bitch a migraine, heart attack and the munchies.”

I love my red wine after a crazy day of working with them jealous hoes. “I didn’t say stop drinking, just minimize how much consume.” “I hear you Sharon, let’s talk about this later over a medium well steak and some wine, I’m starving.” Girl you are too much, you should be a comedian.

Over the next few weeks Tesia committed to most of the things Sharon suggested surprisingly enough. In a matter of two weeks the results started to show.

Good morning Sharon. Tesia are you okay this morning, I’ve been calling you all morning; that’s unlike you not to pick up. Girl, I’m so damn depressed today. Why? I can’t seem to fit into none of my clothes; everything is too big now that I’m losing weight and inches. You know that three hundred dollar AlakaD skirt I bought two months ago, is too damn big. I held it up and it looked like curtains. Sharon started cracking up laughing. You are a fool Tes. I tell you what let’s go shopping after work, you can pick out a few outfits on me. “Now you talking; can a big girl get some shoes too, you know that’s what a complete outfit is” said Tesia.

Throughout the work day, everyone was complimenting Tesia on her new look. Even one of the Account Executives she once had her eye on had to give her a double look as she walked passed him; glowing. He stopped dead in his tracks. “Tesia, I love that perfume that you’re wearing and by the way; you looking great.” Thank you Mr. Hall” “Call me Steven” he said. Okay, Mr. Hall. Tesia continued walking with her head held high. The weight loss didn’t change Tesia, the people around Tesia changed.

That evening after shopping with Sharon, they both decided to go to a happy hour at the Fellaship Cigar Bar. This was an upscale cigar bar that was own by Cam Newton, the quarterback of the Carolina Panthers. Both women were looking good in their new outfits and just out to enjoy themselves with no expectations or intentions.

Not one or two but every man in the build at some point looked there way; some smiled and others threw up their glasses as a sign of how are you. Once they were seated, it didn’t take long for the first man to make his move. Over two rounds of drinks, a couple of Cuban cigars and already two hours of enjoying themselves; therechad been over 10 men they turned down. They were either, too aggressive, couldn’t take their eyes off the breast, had playboy tendencies or just wasn’t attractive. Until Tesia notice one guy that would look over at her from time to time and smile. A thick neck, big guy, sort of like a linebacker. He sat at a table alone, but guys coming in was walking up to him shaking his hand and patting him on the back. He never once got up, just enjoying his drinks and cigar. When the waitress came over to check on Tesia and Sharon; they asked who was he. The waitress responded, “Oh that’s Ezell Crawford, he’s a defensive lineman for the Carolina Panthers.” “By the way, he wanted to know what were you ladies drinking, next round on him and also girlfriend wearing the dark blue; he told me to tell you the color you wearing looks gorgeous on you.” Tesia, who he was referring too, jumped out of her chair and made her way over to thank him in person. It wasn’t long before he was joining the ladies in their area. Ezell and Tesia seem to hit it off with each other; I mean you couldn’t get a sheet of notebook paper in between them; as they were sitting right under each other for the next three hours. He was truly a good looking, well mannered gentle giant. You could tell he was well respected, he came over and joined us for a few mintues. Ezell introduced us but his special introduction for Tesia was, “This is going be Mrs. Crawford oneday” he told Cam. Cam agreed with him and added; “ya’ll would look good together too, seriously, we can double date.” Tesia was all smiles, I think she lost 20 pounds blushing and I gained 10 pounds feeling like the Uber driver that got her there.

Over next several weeks and months, Ezell and Tesia seen each other everyday, infact Carolina is playing Arizona this weekend and we’re boarding the plane now. I guess I’m going to be the third wheel until I find someone; until then I’m happy for my friend Tesia Feely-Crawford. Oh yes, he popped the question six months into their relationship and now she’s living like a Boss, you go Phat girl!

Then the unplanned unthinkable happened.

“God had other plans” by A.Dakala

Everyone in the city of Atlanta was so excited about the Super bowl on Sunday. The entire city wore black and red on that Friday before the game. We even had pre-super bowl pot luck at the job, lots of food; you would have thought it was thanksgiving day.

The night before I had took a laxative and as I was leaving the conference room I made a dash for the men’s bathroom. I totally forgot I took those pills, but my stomach quickly reminded me after the second plate of spicy chicken wings and bake beans.  I was sitting in the bathroom all comfortable and like at home, I pulled out my cellphone to surf the internet enjoying the silence, except for the blower that was turned on.

My mom’s name appeared as an incoming call, it was unlike her to call during the day like that, because normally she would call or text me early in the morning. Once I answered and before she could even open her mouth to say anything, my heart fluttered as if something was wrong. “Anthony, Shawn is in the Trauma unit, they just coded her” she said. “What you mean coded her?”, I replied. “They coded her, they don’t have a pulse and they putting her on a breathing machine”.  Not only did I instantly go into shock mode, but my emotions started to get the best of me. I could barely stop my legs from shaking on the toilet. I saw losing my sister Shawn flash before me in seconds, I could not imagine life without her, my mother, father or brother.  She’s the baby of the family.

I went to sit at my desk to catch my breath; one of the ladies in the office saw the pain through my eyes and asked if I was okay.  I did my best in a crackling voice to explain to her, but the trying to talk and gasp for air at the same time was like being scared unexpectedly.  She ran quickly to my manager and he came over to my office and said pack your things I will take you home. I told him I will be okay, I have to go get my sons and drive to South Carolina. He was worried that I couldn’t drive in a emotional state, but i got myself together enough to make it out of the office into my car. I wanted to release all the anger I had inside, so my steering wheel got a beat down like a five second Mike Tyson fight.

I called everyone in my house an explained what was going on and they all was ready to pack and leave.

So i got the family in the car and we are on the road and this is where things got fuzzy for me. It was a three hour drive to South Carolina and until this day, i don’t remember nothing about the drive there. I couldn’t tell you nothing about the conversations in the car, how fast I was going; i do know i wasn’t speeding. I prayed and talked to God the entire road trip and re-assured me that my sister would be just fine. I was behind the wheel of the car, but God was driving the vehicle.

Once we arrived at the hospital around 7 o’clock, my sister was on a breathing tube, it was very hard for me to see her in that state, but God told me he taking care of her. My mom told me before I arrived she was in a medical induced coma for now. I kid you not I wanted to break down. I refuse to leave the hospital until I seen my sister eyes and heard her voice. By 6 o’clock that Saturday morning, I walked over to her bed and grabbed her hand, “Shawn i’m here now, you can wake up, and i’m not leaving until you do”, I said. A hour later, my sister open her eyes, still heavily medicated, she looked over at me. Her eyes were glassy as if she wanted to cry. I still held onto her hand, “this your brother  Anthony” I said. “If you can hear me squeeze my hand”. She squeezed my hand as tight as she could!

Over the next few hours, I saw my sister go from a breathing tube, to opening her eyes, to squeezing my hand, to writing messages on a note pad, to sitting up straight in the bed, to the breathing tube being removed, to talking to everyone that walked in the room to visit her. Man thinking about it now I cried but I knew God had kept his word, and like a receipt to baking a cake, he had a receipt that required steps to his plan. Though my sister got diagnosis with congested heart failure, years later she is still with us and living life, even better than she was before that day. God I thank you and give you all the praise.

This is not just a story, it’s a spiritual uplifting message that my heart witness and produced.

A.Dakala

 

 

 

Boy Please! By A. Dakala

February 2, 2019; 6 o’clock.

Me and my BFF’s; Shari, Renee and Bonita decided to go to the cabins in the Georgia mountains this weekend, since we didn’t have anything else to do and we all were single now. We all have boy toys to go to in a time of a sexual needs; but nothing serious because any of them were worth settling down with. So as sisters in the name of love; we all decided to break up with all their asses, on the same day at the same damn time.

It’s seems that as the older we got; the harder it was to find a good loving man without having to lose who we were or having to give up our bodies to sex lusters with no goals.

Both men and women at some point in their lives come with so much baggage these days; it’s either baby mama or daddy drama, in between jobs, momma boys or daddy girls, criminal records, no jobs, hustling drugs; hell I could go on and on.

The ones that don’t have extra baggage are unattractive in their own way or no where near qualified to be seen out in public without wanting to attempt to display public affection. I refuse to belittle my qualifications for a steak or seafood dinner date. Why does life have to be so difficult and complicated or is it just me?

So we arrived at the cabins, ready to open up bottles of wine, have a few days of girl talk and see what single men are available for us single women. There was only one issue. It was National LGBT weekend.

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