“A Needle In A Haystack” by A.Dakala

Jasmine and I have been together for three years and out of nowhere she ends up pregnant six months ago. For two years I’ve been keeping a couple of secrets from her and everytime it seems to be the right to tell her, something happens. This is her first child and I already have a daughter that I barely get to see in person but we do facetime each other; every other day. She lives with her mother in Belize, I normally fly there once a year around my daughter’s birthday.

This situation with Jasmine has really taken a toll on my thought process. My heart don’t want to disappoint her but my brain is telling me that coming forward is the best solution for both sides and don’t disappoint myself. See two years ago we had a major fall out. I stormed out the house and headed to the store to buy a beer. I had one hundred dollars in my pocket so I decided to buy a beer and a few scratch off lottery tickets. On the very last ticket. I had a match for a one million dollar prize. A part of me wanted to pick up the phone and tell her but my pride wouldn’t allow me too. That was two years ago and now this. I kept the money from her because I wanted to surprise her if we got married. I didn’t waste or over spend, in fact I bought her a new car but told her it was from my 401k money. I really want to repossess it from her ass but i know she needs transportation. But the ice on the cake was my biggest secret of all. I promise myself tomorrow I am going to sit down with her and spill my guts.

To be continued……

“If these walls could talk” by A.Dakala

“Scorpios has the strongest memory out of all zodiacs”

Close your eyes and listen to the conversations that the walls are having. It’s like barbershop and hair salon gossip session. Sometimes you have to pray for God to reveal what you can’t see but what you knew all along. There’s confirmation in prayer. Just take time to get on your knees and talk to God. You either learn from it, build on it or run away from it. People say things unexpectedly based on things they been wanting to say all along. Holding on to build up cludder makes a hoarder. A snake can only bite you if your in harms way looking with your blinders on, so if you chase mice long enough; your probably end up in a rat trap. The truth hurts but like every painful heartache; eventually the pain fades away, so no need to indulge into ice cream, cookies or cakes. We are all thinkers with Brittle and fragile feelings, that’s what makes each one of us different and unique. Observe your foot steps and the path your walking on and determine is the path big enough to share. Will it enhance what you already have within you alone; or hinder your embedded stones you worked so hard to segregate from the person you once were.

Trying to solidify your new beautiful stones in a lake full of cement to harden has often been disguised as a landfield full of mud. Remember muddy foundations will never harden eternally, because once it rains you’re back to pulling out your old shovels; patching up pot holes that still have air pockets. If it didn’t work then; it probably wont work now. A zebra doesn’t change its strips.

So when the temperatures in the kitchen reaches a boiling point and the mud dries; all you have remaining is crumbling dirt. So its not if these walls can talk, its are we listening when they do speak. Infact I am having 5 conversations as we speak with four walls and a ceiling and I had no clue they felt that way about me, but in the twelve round they definitely got my attention.

I woke up to my alarm going off like it was a work day, it’s the weekend and I am either planning my flea market trip, getting a pedicure or packing up my suit case for a staycation somewhere local. I haven’t been to Chattanooga in a while. This would be a good road trip to just get my thoughts together and let my hair down. I hear there’s a Jazzfest going on downtown and before the pandemic shuts everything down; I need to put my plans in motion.

I never been the type that needed to invite all of my girlfriends like we are waiting to exhale, I know how to have a great time and entertain myself; that’s why I’m the life of the party out of my circle of friends. Of course I mention it to one girlfriend that told another, that told another and now there’s nine of us taking this trip. I’m not sure if I want the company of eight other women, we all got some sort of relationship issues going on. Lord knows I do not want this to turn into a wine, cookies and movie weekend. I’m trying to party, drink and dance. I can care less about guys trying to holler etc. they do that here, I need this time to be about me. I got one rule to all eight women, if you don’t pay to stay, you will not go and if you pay, be ready to roll out or your ass will get left.

“Desperate Housewives” A. Dakala

     Four educated, beautiful, and intelligent women who met at a local book club married the men of their dreams and lived the life they all dream of. Megan, Alisha, Cathy, and Samantha, all four were real housewives giving up their own careers to support their husband’s dreams, which in returned created multi-million-dollar businesses. All they had to do was be eye candy for the big corporate events, glamorous for every flick of the camera and stress relievers at home anytime their mates needed some love pampering. These women knew their roles and played them very well, taking care of home first, dinner always cooked daily, waiting on their men like waitresses at a restaurant. Giving up their own careers for love wasn’t easy, but once those diamond carats hit their fingers, there was no turning back.

     After spending months getting to know each other at the local book club, the women decided to introduce their husbands to each other. Everything was following in place; the housewives had their kings, and everyone seemed to be getting alone building the perfect friendships. Ironically the guys started talking about joint business ventures, but one by one their relationships started to crumble overnight due to a surfacing rumor.

     The women only had each other to lean on for comfort and advice. Everyone supported each other for therapy, trying to find out the solution to keeping their marriages together. Relying on their husbands for so long without any means for financial stability, each of the women seen their lives sparrowing out of control. Their husbands controlled every dollar, nothing was in their names, but with so much at stake, they had to make the problem or problems go away by all means necessary. Feeling betrayed by the ones close to them, embarrassed by the media and used by the men who had nothing in the beginning when they first met them, each had a motivate for revenge, seeking their own justice. It wasn’t about the luxury cars and the mansions; it was all about the money, the power and the respect. Until death do us apart!

     “You know our book club has really turned into a great sisterhood for us” Samantha said. “I’m so happy our husbands click with each other and are now hanging out.” “So, what’s the book of this month?” Cathy asked. “I suggest Scars of a butterfly; I hear it has a great storyline to it.” “It must have a juicy love scene in there, you know Megan loves erotic love stories,” Alisha said. “I do not, it’s not about sex; it has an interesting title and the introduction caught my attention” said Megan.

       Like clockwork, the ladies meet up every morning at Star Bucks for coffee, then walk a block to the Internet Cafe’ to meet up with about ten other ladies for their daily book readings. Some of the other ladies have children, unfortunately none of the sisterhood women have kids as of yet, but all are working overtime in the bedroom to produce a few.  Every day the same city workers wait to see the ladies approaching, you should hear some of the comments, nothing negative, but the girls love the compliments never paying them any attention. As they approach the Café’ door, one of the gentlemen crosses the street, damn near stopping traffic to open the door for them. “Aww thank you, you’re such a sweetheart,” Meagan said. “I have a question ladies, everyday ya’ll come to the Café dressed like models, smelling good, I see you all have rings on your fingers, how can I find a woman like this?” says the man. Alisha was the only one that spoke, “well you will know when you find her, just remember in relationships there no secrets, lots of love making and great communication then a relationship can conquer anything” says Alisha. Without anyone of those you’re just fishing in a sea for another fisherman to take your fish.

The worker just smiled as the door shut. The other girls just died laughing, “fishing and fisherman, girl you’re crazy as hell”. “Its true ladies, we have to keep our men happy at all times, look how we Live; what woman doesn’t won’t to get up in the morning; get all dolled up and not worry about going to someone’s job every day?”. “says Cathy.

     “Damn, I left my book in the trunk, now I have to walk back to the car” says Megan. “Girl I will walk with you, don’t want you finding one of the city workers attractive”, said Alisha.” Girl I got my man”.  

     The city workers were busy working this time; a few looked up and smiled. No one said anything to the Alisha and Megan, but they definitely looked as they wanted the attention.

      “Wait for a minute, let me smoke this cigarette before we get to the car” says Megan. She leans across the parking deck rails looking down below. “Alisha come here, isn’t that Juan’s car right there, don’t he have his name on the back of his car?”  “Girl that is him” says Alisha.  Minutes later, Juan walks out of the Waffle House and there’s a chic right behind him. They walked towards Juan vehicle. Megan takes a picture of Juan and the chic as she held on to Juan’s arm.  He opens the car door for her and gives her a kiss. The Chic smiles. Alisha and Megan looks at each other in amazement.

  “In two weeks, Cathy’s husband will be celebrating his 38th birthday and she plans on throwing him a huge surprise party at the yacht club, I hope he is not cheating on her”. “Hell, it’s obvious that he is, we just witness it” says Megan. The women didn’t say anything else on the walk back, their whole demeanor had switched, just trying to make sense of what they just saw. Cathy and Samantha picked up on it right away; you could tell by the tone of their voices that something was bothering them. Samantha excuses herself to the ladies’ room, and then taps Alisha on the shoulder as she walks by to meet her there. Alisha stood by the bathroom entrance with her arms folded. “What happen outside, did one of those guys say something to one of you, because you know our husbands will be up here with a quick phone call”. Alisha told her it’s nothing like that, “Listen I do not want to cause any problems or issues, but we saw Cathy’s husband leaving Waffle house with some woman and they left in his car” says Alisha. “Juan who, Cathy’s husband?” “Yes”. Samantha wasn’t surprised she said she thought she seen him there one other time when she was running late but didn’t think much about it. Even though they knew they

Should not get involved, they knew they had to tell their friend. Samantha had a plan after the book club.

      As things wrapped up, Samantha suggested they all go over to Lenox Mall and sit at the Cheesecake Factory for bunch. Cathy notice something wasn’t right but figured it was just something personal. Alisha and Megan both were making eye contact with Samantha like how in the hell are you going to pull this off. Samantha’s quick-thinking kicks in. “That couple sitting over there, doesn’t even look like they should be in here, he probably sneaking around” she said. “Girl you need to stop, you don’t even know them” Cathy said laughing. “So girls tell me, if one of you were out and seen my man hugged up with another chic, would ya’ll tell me?” At first no one said a word. “Samantha would you tell me?” says Cathy. “Why you ask me first, ask Megan or Alisha first”. “Samantha, you my girl, you all my girls and I never want to see any one of us hurt, but if I did would you believe me?” “Yes, I would because we are all so much alike and we all have a lot in common” says Samantha. Alisha eyes grew watery and decided excuse herself from the table. “What’s wrong with Alisha is Joseph having an affair with someone?” Cathy whispered. “No, but we think Juan is though”. “Juan fucking who, my husband Juan?” “Yes” “Cathy, Alisha and I saw him at the Waffle House when we walked to the car and he came out with some white chic, kissed her and they left in his car”. “Wait, wait, wait, my husband Juan?” Megan pulls out her cell phone and shows Cathy the picture she took. Cathy pulls out her cell phone, no Cathy don’t call him, you got to think smarter, right now your upset and mad. Cathy comes to her senses, Alisha returns and she seen the pain in Cathy’s eyes. “Girl I’m so sorry, we will get through this together”. They all joined hands and prayed. They knew that all of the husbands hung out together and there was a possibility that they were more women about to surface. As a group they decided to monitor things in their own households without saying a word. Instead of spending days at the book club, they would meet up at each other’s home and investigate things.

     As they departed, Cathy tried her best to keep it together, not to break her everyday routine at home. But deep down inside she was boiling like a volcano ready to explode at any minute. “I know his cheating ass go want some sex tonight, I just may cut his penis off” she says to herself. Thoughts were flowing, retracing some of Juan’s actions in her head, the times he said he was working late or had to step out to go back to his office. A month ago, she was picking up his suites from the cleaners and the clerk gave her a receipt that he left in his blazer for a lunch at Pappadeaux’s; he never takes his clients out that restaurant. Her mind was just racing, so much so she ran the red light, and was t-boned at the intersection by pickup truck.

     Cathy could barely open her eyes looking up at the ceiling of bright lights, and a room of voices sometimes overshadowed by the monitor to her left beeping every few seconds. She could feel someone holding her hand but was unable to move her fingers. It took a few minutes until her vision cleared. “Baby can you hear me, it’s your husband” Juan said. “You were in a car wreck, but don’t worry you going to be okay”. Cathy closes her eyes, as tears ran freely down the side of her face. A nurse practitioner started changing her IV fluids; she started to get a little feeling in her neck. Dr. Mason walked in the room, Juan was still holding Cathy’s hand. “How are you feeling young lady, you had all of us scared there for a moment” says Dr. Mason. Cathy still under heavy medication, just stared at Dr. Mason. “Well to let you and your husband know, it’s nothing that time won’t heal, you have a broken collar bone and few cracked ribs”. “Right now, you’re under some pain medication that will start to wear off and you may regain some feelings back soon”. Dr. Mason pats Juan on the back, “You married to a tough cookie, take good care of this special lady”, he said. Juan just smiled from ear to ear. Cathy’s visual was slightly clearing, as she looked over at her husband; she notices he wasn’t wearing his wedding ring. Still unable to completely speak, she just turned her head. “Baby I’m going down to the gift shop, I will be right back” says Juan. As Juan was leaving, her girlfriends were peeping in the room door, “Can we come in?” “How is she doing?” Juan pulls them to the side and gives them an update on her prognoses. As he exited the room, all of their concerned looks, turned into angry faces. “Girl did you see that Negro, he didn’t even have his wedding ring on” whispered Alisha. “Shameful ass” “I can hear ya’ll bitches” Cathy mumbled. “How are you feeling Cathy?” She mumbled “Okay’. They all gathered around her beside and just prayed and prayed. Juan walks back into the room with a boutique of flowers and balloons. This time he had on his wedding ring like no one saw him without it. Everyone talked with their eyes, Megan glances down at Cathy; she just shook her head slightly.

     An hour had passed, there were Nurses coming and going out of the room. Juan was still sitting in a chair by Cathy’s bed. “Juan have you spoken to Curtis today, I been trying to call him but the office said he’s been in meetings all day.” Alisha said. “No, I haven’t had a chance to call none of the guys, once the hospital called me I ran straight here.” Said Juan “Excuse me”, Alisha’s phone was buzzing, she stepped out of the room to take the call. It was her husband Curtis. “Baby are you at the hospital, I hear that Cathy was in an accident” said Curtis “How do you know?” said Alisha “Juan called me and told me a few minutes ago” “Oh really?” “Curtis just doesn’t know he just started a war” she said silently to herself. Once Alisha got back in the room, the other women knew whatever the call was about, it wasn’t good. Juan had to run back to his office and said he would be back. Cathy’s medication started to wear off more and more; she had her eyes open at this point, but still in a lot of pain. As soon as Juan left, Alisha went into a brief rage, “Those guys are hiding something, but nothing of the lies is on the same page”. She said. Megan and Samantha knew it was just a matter of time before their situations started to crumble. A few hours passed, neither Samantha nor Megan’s husband, even showed up at the hospital to see Cathy. Cathy on the other hand had fell back to sleep after taking more pain medication. Alisha called Curtis again to let him know she would be leaving soon, but he didn’t pick up the phone, but when she texted him, he immediately texted right back. “Ladies I’m going to go home, I may come back later to check on Cathy” said Alisha. I could tell by the gloomy look in her eyes that something was bothering her deep down. Samantha and Megan watched Alisha walking down the hallway, still looking at her cell phone every few steps. “It’s hard to imagine being with a man for ten years for him to start cheating”, Megan said. “Hell, I wonder where the hell are our men”, said Samantha. Samantha and Megan were so much alike, they both were tired of their men to a certain point anyways. “Believe it or not girl, I know my man is cheating with someone, we haven’t slept together in over a year”. Samantha said. “A year, girl stop playing” Megan said. Samantha goes on to explain that her husband Joseph got mad a few years back because her ex-boyfriend hit her up on face book that he was in town and wanted her to see Semba, which was their dog they once shared. What made matters worse, Samantha fell for the okie doke and met him, took pictures of Semba and this dumb ass dude sends the photos to my husband. So Joseph goes on a temper tantrum that I shouldn’t be conversing with him and the photos are proof that I still love him. So he started sleeping in the guest room and just made it his place to sleep, we still interact with each other, but there’s no sex and I’ve gotten accustom to it, but he can’t fault me if a girl needs to step outside her house to get some. “Girl have you been cheating?” asked Megan. “No, I haven’t but look at me, what man wouldn’t want me, hell I got needs and if my husband won’t go take care of home, well hell I will be playing house”. You can hear Cathy laugh. “Cathy is you okay?” You could hear Cathy moan, yesssss! “Girl you are crazy as hell, I heard everything” she said very low, “but I feel you, hell I need some as soon as I get these damn cast off my body” she giggled. Samantha and Megan looked at each other and started laughing. For the first time today, Cathy was speaking, each minute she got clearer and clearer. Another hour passed; Megan forgot she told her husband she would be home to cook dinner late. After a few more hugs and kisses, Megan left the hospital and headed home. Samantha stayed behind a little longer waiting for Juan to return before she left but he never showed up. “Go home Samantha, I will be okay, he is probably with his other woman” Cathy said. The tears started to fill up in Cathy’s eyes, she turns her head towards the Television, Samantha watches in silence. She kneels down and kissed Cathy on the forehead, “We’re going to get through this, we all have each other”.  Samantha walks out with so much hatred in her heart. Cathy grabs the sheet of the bed as if she was angry at the world; she knew she had to get healed soon.

     Alisha goes straight to Curtis’s office. The receptionist looks shock to see her there. “Where’s my husband?” He’s not here today. “Earlier you told me he was in meetings all day, so which one is it, he in meetings or not here?” says Alisha. “Curtis took the day off on a personal matter that’s all I know, he advises everyone in the office to take a message for anyone that calls, even his wife”. “Oh really, where did he go did, he say?” “No, he didn’t say”. Alisha quietly walks to the exit door without causing a scene. The ladies in the office just looked at each other, and once she was gone, they all started whispering. “Must be trouble in paradise”, one of the ladies said. Alisha stood beside her car in the parking deck, shaking her head “This asshole thinks he is slick” She said. She gets in her car and drives home to check their bank records online.

     She notices that he hasn’t even attempted to call home. She calls him once more before she decides if she’s got to go ham crazy or not. Once again the voicemail comes on. She texts him, he texts back, “Baby give me a minute I’m on the phone” says Curtis. She waits and waits for over forty-five minutes. Then the phone rings from a private number. “Hello”. “I just want you to know that your husband is cheating on you with me” a woman’s voice said. “Who the hell is this, and how did you get my number?” “Out of your husband’s phone, he’s in the shower at the moment”. Then the lady calls Curtis to verify, “Baby do you need a towel?” “Yes baby, I do” says Curtis. The woman hangs up the phone. Alisha still has the phone in her hand; his voice just repeated itself in her head over and over and over. She pictured herself cutting his dick as he slept, then she started stripping her clothes off, layer by layer. “I can’t believe I let your dirty as hands touch me, no telling where your damn lips been” she spoke out loudly. Alisha stood there naked; make up running followed by her tears. She dials up Samantha. “Hi Alisha girl” “Alisha could barely speak, her words were crackling, “Curtis is cheating on me” Alisha said. Samantha paused for a moment. “How did you find out?” “The bitch he is with called my house and confirmed; I heard his lying ass in the shower”. They stayed on the phone for a few minutes, but Samantha had to go deal with her own issues. Alisha checks the bank accounts and notice that the password has been changed. She calls the bank to get some information but he has changed the password. After speaking with the financial advisor, she realized that Curtis has blocked her from any use of the family accounts. She is dead broke.

     Samantha was married to Joseph an accounting expert, numbers and money was his rise to fame, but he also was a gambler. Joseph and Megan’s husband Walter were best friends since elementary school. Samantha knew there was a chance that Joseph wouldn’t be home, this was something she got use to over the years. Wherever he was act was fine with her. But to her surprise Joseph was home, as she pulled up to the mail box she could see him with his back against the window talking on the telephone. She parks and turns her lights off, then walks down the side walk towards the living room window. Joseph never turned around, but she could hear him telling someone he just needs a couple more weeks to change things. She calls his cell phone, you can see him pick it up, looks at Samantha calling and throwing his phone down. He didn’t attempt to answer. Samantha rushes to open the door, I mean it only took seconds, as she walked in the living room, Joseph was pretending to be looking through a magazine. He forgot to hang up the phone and you could hear a faint voice still talking, sound like a woman but Samantha wasn’t sure. She just looked at him and shook her head. Lately every room she walked in, he walked out of. Their living arrangements were that of roommates almost. Joseph grabs his cell phone as soon as Samantha was out of site. “Let me call you back”. “You didn’t have to hang up from her, I could care less” Samantha hollered from the kitchen. Joseph walks out of the room without saying a word. Samantha goes upstairs to get something from the walk in closet; Joseph has locked the bedroom door, so she bangs on it like the police knocking down the door. Joseph hollers from the other side “What the hell is your problem?” he said. “Open the fucking door” she said. Joseph unlocks the door. “You don’t have to continue hiding your dirty women”. “If you’re so unhappy Samantha why are you still here?” That comment made Samantha furious. Every other word out of her mouth wasn’t that of the child of God. “Remember negro, when I met you, you had nothing and I gave up everything for you to be successful, for us to be successful”. “So why are you angry, you still living good, you still get everything you want” Joseph said. “I don’t care about that; I only care about my marriage”. Samantha stood there waiting on Joseph to response but he never did, he continues putting on his socks, glancing across at Samantha. “Oh by the way, I had you removed from my bank account, you can go open you up one tomorrow” He said. “What you mean have me removed?” Joseph went on an explained that she needs to find her own money that he no longer is supposing a wife who doesn’t pleases her man. Samantha throws her shoes at Joseph; he jumps up and grabs her arm. “Don’t you as long as you living in my fucking house disrespect me again”. Samantha pushes him away runs to the bathroom and slams the door. You could hear Joseph walking out of the room with his keys. Samantha sits on the toilet, wiping away her running nose.

     The only relationship that seems to be still worth saving was Megan’s. She and Walter was the youngest couple out of the fiesta. During all the hoopla going on with the other girls, Megan and Walter were lying in bed doing what they do best just about every night having sex.

     Megan felt Walter making love to her like no man did before.  Her legs were already spread to the limits and were resting comfortably on his broad shoulders.  She was panting and begging him to take it easy on her… but he was half way listening to her.  He drilled her sexually like there was no tomorrow, making the moans and groans louder with every stroke.  Even she tried to stop him with her hands, to no avail. He was excited and wouldn’t stop until filling her with all of himself. “You are really trying to make a baby honey?” she asked. The first release felt so good to her, the perfect pain but realizing he still had three inches more of him still left to pound into her. He was pushing her legs back to the limits and that was far beyond the point where her knees almost could touch the bed.

“God knew better” by A. Dakala

A man’s childhood downfalls damaged his character. His insecurities lead him into abusing romantic relationships that once had a promising future but eventually a web of red flags and lies would lead to betrayal. It took one text message that ended it all.

Men will do whatever it takes to get a woman’s attention, whether it’s hiding behind fake characters of who they really are or buying their love through hush gifts and money. A Godly heart can not be bought and if there’s any woman out there who thinks money and gifts are true meanings of love, your wasting your time and putting your life on hold for finding true happiness. Ask Breona if you see her.

I write this with a very heavy heart, knowing that my best friend is going through turmoil with the man she claims she love. On the outside looking in, I see a totally different individual who tries to deceive women with fake attention, money and gifts but in return; it’s all about his addiction to sex, controlling attitude and a childhood filled with abuse from his father. Men like him, doesn’t care about a woman’s heart, their too busy thinking with their penis; looking for ways to be in control.

My BFF met Jerod Mathis through some mutal friends. Though no one really knew this man and anything about his past, he protrayed himself to be a gentleman; but he really was a sheep in wolf clothing. Unfortunately, my girlfriend Breona was deceived by the fake smile, the over baring attention and his control tactics that were far from being a real man. In the beginning, she seemed happy, her and the kids were traveling forty five minutes to his place on the weekends, I thought maybe he had changed. It was hard for me to catch up with Breona most of the time and when we did have a few minutes to meet up to have a drink to discuss life and love; it was always interrupted by Jerod calling and checking to see where she was, who she was with and when was she going home. His ass would even make her video chat him to verify that no men were present. Her entire demeanor would change when he called, she would race out like he was clocking her running to the finish line. That was the first signs of my worries, for her and the kids safety. I’m pretty sure this has been going on for some time now, way beyond me witnessing it first hand.

One weekend on a girls day out shopping, Jerod was blowing Breona’s phone up. The voice mails he left sounded as if he was drunk. I remember awhile back she explained to me that he had a drinking problem and even his mom had asked her to talk to him about cutting down on his drinking. As soon as you confront him or want to talk about an issue, he turns and plays the victim. He would cry fake tears to get his way. It wasn’t long before shit would hit the fan; I received that phone call I was praying i never would get………..

She Reeled Me In” by A.Dakala

Fool me once shame on you but to fool me twice shame on me. Giving your heart to someone cold hearted is a task when they continuously show you that you mean nothing to them. Its funny how someone would stay with a person that disrespect them but disrespect the person that’s trying to build a future with them. This is how it started.

I finally met the woman of my dreams but after three months I found myself telling her I love you already . My heart wants to believe this is the one, but she constantly tells me how she would sneak off to a club when her ex was at work. I took a mental note of that in the back of my mind.

Nevertheless I love this woman’s personality and wanted to show her what being in love was all about. I honestly don’t think she cheated on me in the beginning, but everyone’s definition of cheating is different. Cheating is not always physical, it could also be mental. It could be sharing unknown conversations with the opposite sex or now days the same sex knowing they have a thing for you. If you’re in a relationship and that person is unaware, that could be labeled as cheating.

You can never please someone who doesn’t have the desire to push themselves. I swear no matter what, my heart felt it still grew daily for this woman; there was something special about her. We connected on so many levels; shared so many nights of three to four hour telephone conversations, at times dosing off on each other in the middle of deep conversing. But, there was something I wasn’t doing right or something she was doing wrong. In the beginning our love life was perfect, then the steps of the ladder started to crumble like old wood from a farm barn built in the 1960’s. Even still, I loved this woman like when I first met her.

We never missed a day of talking, I looked forward to telling her about my day and she sharing hers. When her job was stressing her; I made sure I gave her my undivided attention. I wanted to ease her pain, massage her stress and take on her struggles; I wanted to protect my Queen. I wanted our love to be like two best buddies on a win win headed to the alter. Her words spoke volumes of being prepared to settle down but her actions were like balancing on roller skates you hadn’t been on in over twenty years.

(To be continue)

Pain Makes A Diamond Lexus by A. Dakala

Yesterday, I pulled up at the red light anxiously waiting for the light to turn green trying to get to my dentist appointment. To the right of my vision, I could see the front end of a white Lexus pulling up at a high rate of speed. My first thought, another one of these youngsters wanting to race because they see a nice vehicle on rims ready to test out their engine. As the turning light turns green, the Lexus moves forward and now we are even. I never even glance over to see who was driving. The traffic light turn green, I punched the gas pedal; I went zero to sixty in seconds, I could see the white Lexus gaining ground. Once I made it to the next light, I pulled into the gas station. The white Lexus pulled in right behind me. I got out trying not to make eye contact with the driver. “You know you cheated right?”, I looked up to a beautiful, thick and sexy pecan tan female walking towards me. “I didn’t know you wanted to blow out that little engine,” I said. She laughed and reached out her hand and I shook hers. “I’m Dak,” I said. She introduced herself as Shaky. “So I guess I will get your government name over dinner,” “What make you think you going to make it that far, you know we met before on the dating app right?”, “Yes I remembered you and I figured, at some point you will want to redeem yourself trying to get even, since I embarrassed you back there and you owe me an apology for not following through the first time we met.” I laughed, if I recalled, you went out with your girlfriends and was going to call me once you got home, after 2 am, I never heard from you.” “Ok, mister; you are right, I had too much to drink that night, second time is a charm, so call me.” She gave me her number and walked away, all I could do is say damn to myself and not mention I filled up my tank with gas when I was only trying to put twenty dollars in my tank. She had me distracted with that big butt.

Two weeks later, we finally going on our first dinner date after spending days talking on the phone and catching up with each other from our first encounter. I felt like I had been knowing her for years. So this is how it all started.

Both fed up with being alone and the world of merry go round dating, Shaky and Dak decided to give online dating a shot.  For months they searched, started over and met up with individuals with the same old lame mentality and none seem to be that one they both were looking for.

     A few minutes later the two chatted back and forth online; this went on for about a week or so. Everything seem to be out on the table and very straight forward; getting along very well we decided to exchange numbers.  There was a instant connection, we talked and texted throughout the day for weeks.  Naturally, the next step would be to actually meet face to face.  It was then decided we would meet; of course, Shaky being the old-fashioned type when it comes to the dating scene; she insisted I take the lead on making the arrangements.  

     Being that my life was a bit more hectic, Shaky was good with being flexible because everything was going well, and she didn’t want to add any additional pressure to my complicated work life schedule; plus she worked from home. 

     Today, was the day we would finally meet, I couldn’t wait but some time had passed, so I texted and called Shaky, but she didn’t response to either. A couple of days went by and then the anxiety of waiting kicked in. I got worried at first, then it that turned into anger; “was she playing games, am I the topic of her next girlfriend outing?” I said to myself.  I wonder was this all just a big; let me see if I can get him Interested or a misunderstanding?  I decided to take it to God, I knew I really liked Shaky and felt she liked me too but what happened? That night I fell to my knees and took it to God.

“Lord, please guide me in the right direction, whatever you tell me to do I will do, but God, if this chic is not in the hospital with a leg or arm wrapped in a cast or had a family emergency requiring her to get on a airplane to Cheraw, forgive me for the pimp words I’m about to release from my tongue on her ass” Amen.

     I decided to give her three days, that is what I told God and God agreed.  Either she will reach out to me or I would reach out to her for a complete understanding of her disappearing act.  “Father give me the willpower; this is the longest three days I’ve ever been through waiting on a woman; sitting in the dark.” 

     A one-sided view of a relationship unfolding. My heart believes God is the key to every dilemma, challenge and good thing in my life. No matter what, He has the final word and say so. It’s not clear as to how strongly Shaky feels about my beliefs but it’s still early and patience is the one thing I know I need to work on. 

     My request was honored. Three days of her silence; God would show that he was listening to my prayers. Shaky rose from the concrete like a rose in Tupac’s poem after three days, but this felt like months for me. Shaky actually texted her on the third day and explained her circumstances. Not sure if I was buying all of what she was selling, but I knew how to keep the receipt of lies just in case I needed to get a refund upon my investigation.

     We seemed a bit closer even after that situation; still not defining their relationship or the desire to embark on one with each other; just letting it flow and continuing innocently flirting our attraction to one another. I’m still practicing patience and perhaps Shaky was practicing precautions, both unwilling to commit to calling this the beginning of a relationship. After a few weeks of bliss, Shaky once again fell of the radar… here we go again. 

     Refusing to believe Shaky didn’t get how important communication is to any relationship regardless of the dynamics, I couldn’t believe we were back to square one and once again, I was left sitting in the damn dark, but this time I took my ass to bed.

     Lying there for a few minutes in silence after trying to get my own mind and heart together; the phone rang, and it was confirmation on the start of a new job. That call made me feel good but still there was one more answer I needed. “Did she move on, was she not the one or was I not the one for her?” I wondered. I decided to call Shaky from my home phone, and she answered. I was very cautious in approaching the conversation because after all, we weren’t in a mutually committed relationship. “Should I express my anger or concerns?” I thought.  All I felt was disappointment because I thought better of Shaky.  

     Apparently, I forgot she had blocked Shaky after drinking wine all night the other night and forgot to unblock her. She sent me screen shot of all the messages she had sent me.  So, there it was, an issue of technology and misunderstanding. God did it again! Shaky and I are no longer sitting in the dark waiting for each other, I see a light leading me on a path that only God knows where it will lead us. Our communication has to get better moving forward. Shaky also agreed to do better on her end.

     For the most part, Shaky and I were living life. I wondered from time to time if I was too much for Shaky. Was she afraid of getting too close to me; for fear that I would hurt her? We haven’t really had much conversation about past lovers, likes or disasters…I didn’t ask her because that would mean she would have to be prepared to reciprocate with answers that I would rather not give at this stage of the relationship.

     Shaky would always mention being overweight and having love handles, was she kidding or was it a fishing expedition preparing me for something she thought could seriously affect the flow of this slow boat to China speed we were going. At this point, if Shaky thought she needed to be perfectly shaped and fit for me, then she really didn’t know me at all. Now I wasn’t expecting to meet Ester from Sanford and Sons. I had no idea; it had been almost two months and we still haven’t had sex with each other. Last night I was thinking would Shaky put her stamp of approval of me by introducing me to her kids.

     Finally, we decided to meet up halfway in Cedarville on New Years Eve, check into a hotel at ten o’clock on a Wednesday night, 2 hours before the new year. I checked in, go showered, put the baby oil on the night stand, set up the Bluetooth speaker to play some Heather Headley love tunes, chilled the bottle of wine and dim the lights. Texted Shaky the room number, second floor, room 204.

At midnight it was a New Year I would never forget; sitting in the dark room alone once again. 12:01am.

The End!

Pretty Poison by A.Dakala

Simon and I are still together; the wedding just got called off temporarily until I can get my thoughts together on exactly what I wanted to do. My friends say that I am living in a fantasy world and that I need to get my life together. Unfortunately Simon hasn’t always been the guy that they have grown to love, beyond the money and the materialistic gift given; he can be a asshole to the third degree.

I grew to love him out of boredom and settling for less. Over the years we both did manish to changed one way or another; and our once head over hills love for each other turned into arguments, fights and resentments. We had a set of friends who didn’t like each other, so getting everybody together for a weekend of bowling seemed impossible unless the bowling alley was heavily guarded with arm security. I wasn’t sure if Simon was homophobic or not but, he could not stand my guy friend Sandy because he was Gay. Lord knows I bet not tell him that Sandy was HIV positive, he would probably pack my bags and through them out the window while I am sleep.

Lately when I’ve been wanting Simon and I to go out on a weekend date night since he got his new car and even personalize his tag; “Mr. Simon” on it, but he makes up some of the poorest excuses I’ve ever heard. So, when he do I get my ass dress, call my friends; mainly Sandy, sneak in Simon’s wallet and take two or three hundred dollars, because my first few drinks go be on his ass and go to the bar downtown.

I have more fun with Sandy and my girlfriend Mina anyways but they always have my straight ass in this gay lounge called Scorpios. I do admit the LGBT community really knows how to party, but I’m straight and do not go that way.

When I left the house Simon was on his laptop downloading music; not sure where he is playing it at, because his car doesn’t have a cd player in it and he doesn’t play it around the house. He’s probably make cds for one of those bimbos in his office, those bitches do not like me at all. I tried to give him a kiss before I left but the negro pushed me off as if I was bothering his ass. As I drove off looking in my rearview mirror, I could see Simon peeping out of the window between the curtains. He’s up to something. I love this man so much but its obvious he don’t love me anymore in the same way or if he even loves me at all.

I met Mina at Sandy’s plushed out condo and parked my car. He lives in a luxury high rise apartment in Atlanta’s downtown Atlantic station area; on the forty second floor. When I say Sandy has style, this dude got all white everything, from leather furniture to white thick bearskin rugs. If I ever did a photo shoot it would be in his living room; naked because he not worried about seeing no pussy. Now my girlfriend Mina is a no nonsense person , who will fight your ass until her titties pop out her shirt; then fix her weave and makeup with your mirror afterwards. I keep her in my circle because we have so much in common. Oh, and she goes both ways sexually. She always have since we met in college; by accidentally dating the same guy. After we both showed up to his dorm to congratulate him on the basketball teams win. She hugged him, I hugged him, I kissed him and she smacked the hell out his ass. We both got kicked out the building and ended up being friends from that day forward. She’s really the life of the party. We took two rounds of shots and headed to Scorpios.

I still try to communicate with Simon just to keep him posted on what I was doing. Like always he will not answer his phone; but will text your ass to death and his ass can barely spell. Good thing he didn’t pick up; these shots got me talking shit and Tripping; I probably would have told him about his momma needing to put on deodorant next time she comes to visit us. I’m tired of disinfecting my house after she leaves.

We pulled up to Scorpio’s and we all was tipsy. Mina already started her people watching and Sandy scanning the parking trying to spot anyone he knows creeping. I had to warn Mina about driving so fast, as she pulled into a parking space next to this pretty red Porsche. Simon never kept his Porsche that clean, that’s why I don’t ride in it. “Girl, you bet not hit that pretty as whip; with that Mr. Simon personalized tag on it”, he said slowly looking at me.

A Storm in the Pulpit by A.Dakala

Pastor Derek Bates was well known in the community as a dedicated church leader; who counseled single men and women and married couples in building a love relationship amongst God. His ministry seem to be very successful and has been publicized up and down the west coast uplifting troubled relationships into healthy spiritual leaders.

Church on sundays at times seem like an arena of speed dating. Everyone was looking for that man of God or God fearing woman to build a strong relationship with; especially when it’s started in Gods house, around God’s people and translated by God’s words. Of course no man is perfect and we can often lead a horse to water but we can’t make him drink. Brother Derek had lead many women to the waters to drink; but many were unaware of the contamination embedded deep in his soul. He would often fill in for Pastor Wilbert Hall the church’s Lead Pastor, who spends a lot of his time over the summers; traveling conducting missionary work.

Over the past few months, some church members have notice on a couple of occassions different women joining him in the congregation. But this one particular female that someone in the congregation recognized by the name Storm; has been with him at church for the past eight weeks straight. Pastor Bates has yet to introduce her to any of the church members and this sunday he will be preaching the word in Pastor Hall’s absence. Of course there wasn’t any concrete evidence that anyone knew Storm and the only time she has been seen is at church getting out of her new snow white Maserati.

Sister Gloria Williams says she spotted the two in Walmart Tuesday evening buying gift cards for the church annual raffle give away. She passed the young woman pushing a buggy down aisle three; she spoke to her but never received a cracked of a smile back. Pastor has always been attracted to those big butt coke bottle figured women; add her name to his list. Pastor Bates recognized and acknowledged her as well as introducing Stormy as a part of United Baptist Church of God’s newest family member. “So sister you are considering joining us or you have joined us?” said sister Gloria. Storm just smiled as she looked up at Pastor Bates, queuing him to intervene; as words fumbled out of his mouth. Sister Gloria said she either just left the gym, headed to the gym or that was a weekend outfit she had on because her titties did more talking than her mouth. Sister Gloria wanted to take off her shaw she was wearing and give it to her to wrap up what God gave her. Pastor had on jeans and his signature church shoes looking like a pimp out of a GQ magazine. He seem to be in a rush and almost cut off the conversation until sister Gloria heard her name being called over the store’s intercom system to pick up her car from getting a oil changed. Sometimes Sister Gloria stretches the truth a little so there’s no telling what she saw or didn’t see. It may not have even been Pastor Bates.

So that Sunday morning in church all of the nosey church ushers and part of the Deacons on the church boars, couldn’t wait to see who Pastor Bates had with him. So they all piled up on the first three rows to get a glimpse at Pastor Bates mystery woman. “A man with no kids, never been married; got to… be playing house with a full glass of milk” said sister Annie.

The congregation was prompted to stand as Pastor Bates made his way from the back of the church to the front. As the congregation looked on, none of them saw Stormy walk across the stage and sat behind the Pulpit. Pastor Bates walks up the steps and greets her with a kiss on the cheek and shakes the other two guest sitting up there too; hands. Women started looking at each other, roll eyes and Stormy sat there proud with her head held high as if she was the first lady; clutching her Louie Vitton purse. Then Pastor Bates wanted make an church announcement to the concongregation. Everyone was whispering. The usher haters were still, staring at Stormy side ways. “How dare he brings this side chic in the house of the Lord and parade her around us Christian folks like this is a circus.” said sister Pauline.

“Its been a great honor to fill in for Pastor Hall over the years, unfortunately he will not be returning to United Baptist Church of God; he has been called by the Lord to serve a higher purpose christ.” “So its a privilege and honor to introduce to you; United Baptist’s new Leading Pastor, Evangelist Stormy Sterling!

Create a website or blog at WordPress.com

Up ↑